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"Bimm" translates to bisexual married male; "m4m" translates to "married male for married male." Yesterday at a.m., AOL's chat room listings included rooms such as "Bi Curious Married Men" (36 people there), "dallas bimm4bimm" (36 there, too), and "Bostonbimm4bimm" (another 36). It's a difficult life."Steve, who lives in New York, has been married for 27 years, a "great father," he says, to his two preteen boys.

Hook-up ads (sex ads) such as this one in the "Casual Encounters" section of Craigs read: "Traveling to Reston area for business. His wife knows of his ongoing affair with a 47-year-old teacher.

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"But there are true bisexuals out there, and it's a long, gradual process to come to terms with it. It's possible to feel both those things at the same time."But he had been attracted to men since junior high, when he was growing up in the Midwest.

Cruising-for-sex spots, in Rock Creek Park and Meridian Hill Park, just to name two, are attractions. On July 8 at a.m., Bill, the 55-year-old from Boston, leaves this message: "I'm delighted to be a part of this group." He then talks about his wife and how her knowing of his same-sex attraction "threatens" and "hurts" her.

Profiles in chat rooms and postings on Web sites are written in code. Later that day, at p.m., Steve, a 48-year-old who works in photography publishing, says this of his situation: "Basically, it works about as well" -- he laughs a shy laugh -- "as something like this can work.

I've tried the chat feature inside Plenty of Fish and it's horrible and clunky.

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